Grand Designs

First some stories. While on holiday in the south of France Eli had an allergic reaction to something. 2 hours later, some excellent experiment design and marker pen use later I still hadn't discovered what it was. I could only conclude that she was allergic to me or nothing at all. And, as I couldn't leave her- it was impossible to conduct a fair scientific test... When I was a child I liked making potions and as anyone in my chemistry class can attest to- I never grew out of this stage....I am currently conducting a test to objectively categorise people’s sense of smell, and possible taste in food as well.

This leads me to my actual homojournalist house design. I highly suspect me being left alone with a few other sciencey people will result in....this.

Bluebell!!!

I propose we dedicate a floor to this....

It's so shiny and white- like heaven

I may be getting carried away here, but this is after all my dream house. I will second the other homojournalists motions for us to each have a sex room of our own design. I would however, like to take this one step further and propose that we each design a couple of floors in the mansion. (don’t be afraid to dream a little bigger darhling).  I can have my lab, partly for mad science, partly for kinky white coat related hanky panky. But, I can also have my dungeon and 4 poster princess bed, without worrying about a clash in taste.

This is also completely necessary.

As are these.....

....And of course these....

As you may have understood from previous posts. I am at heart a nerd. Left to my own devices I would not sleep, but build a nest. I would read hundreds of books a week, and only leave my nest to eat, have sex and possibly use the bathroom (I say possibly use the bathroom because dialysis may be a legit option). Thus, the homojournalists need one of the libraries pictured below. Trinty college library is enough to make me regret not going down the Oxbridge route. But, no fear one day I’ll break in and if I can’t read the books, I’ll make do with banging a professor on the desk.

So, sex, books and science- why aren’t I hosting grand designs I here you ask? It may be due to the vodka water dispenser I would also require, and the vast quantities of apple trees I would demand in our orchard. But, I think that this place will one day be a reality- as soon as I win the lottery and my insanity becomes distinguished eccentricity instead of criminal.

Thank-yee for reading pets,

Lots of love Mel

xxx