I really wanna take my cats for a walk now....

And here we are. Again. A topic I have no experience in. I wanted 'most awkward situation being LGBT has put you in', I have plenty of those which I can talk about. Most of them include my family. In fact most awkward situations I've been in involve a family member of sorts. Like that time when we went to New York and my mum told the lady at the currency exchange that she wasn't a Virgin, but that we were flying with them...

Even though we're now two months on from 'Find Rory a Boyfriend Week', Colin Morgan still hasn't declared his undying love for me, which just goes to show that you should never let your friends find your boyfriend for you, because they'll be crap at it (although, James sneakily ended his post that week with a suggestion I am not going to refuse. Ever). As such, I thought that rather than give you all really unhelpful hints which are more likely to lose you your potential boyfriend/girlfriend than gain you one, I took it upon myself to do some research (read 'Google'): below are some links with tips which look like they might actually work. I have already memorised one or two of them and plan on using them at Uni, for which I leave.... tomorrow. I really should begin to pack.

So, we have:

• Cosmopolitan's 20 Fun, Fearless Ideas to Help You Meet A Man; although it's aimed at the straight females of the world, I'm sure with a bit of jiggery-pokery (technical term), you can adapt it to suit your needs perfectly. (Incidentally, there are one or two rather handsome men here, worth checking out even if you've already met the man of your dreams.)
• eHow's aptly named How to Meet a Nice Guy; avoid number 3 at all costs, and number 5 should only be considered if you're really, really desperate. Otherwise, go for it.
• Get-the-Guy's Top 10 Places to meet guys in London; as long as you're not arrested for loitering, this could be a good way forward too. Although, after having read number 8, I desperately want to try and take my cat for a walk through Hyde Park...

I wouldn't get very far.

Maybe we can come back to this theme in a couple of months time when I've got a boyfriend, I can share my wisdom better then.

Fuck off out of my sex life, you nosy sods!

I probably don't need to point out that I have no sex-life for you to fuck out of, for reasons which should be obvious to anybody who has read through find Rory a Boyfriend week - namely, I don't have a boyfriend. Doesn't stop you from being nosy sods though...

I could spend this post pondering the definition of virginity, and at what point one actually loses it. Is it, as James suggests, dependant on what sort of sex you've had (or haven't had), or is it much more general in the sense that one immediately ceases to be a virgin once you've had any sort of sexual contact whatsoever? I'm sure someone will answer that question, but I'm not going to, because a) I'm no expert, b) I don't know, c) I have more important things to be doing with my time than wondering at which point you lose your virginity and d) even if I could answer it, it would be as boring as hell.

I could also spend this post giving you explicit details of my non-existent sex life, which of course I'm not going to, because that would mean a) I'd be lying to you, b) we value our readers and c) we'd have to turn on the 'this blog contains adult content' warning, and that requires effort which none of us have.

Having said all this, it occurs to me that some of it is all lies. I'm not going to deny having had sex; whether or not it counts as virginity-stealing sex is another matter, because I suppose sex is the wrong word to use in the first place. 'Fooling around' seems more accurate, because lets face it, when you're young and naive and innocent and are in the same room alone with one person who you happen to 'like-like' and you think there's a small chance that he 'like-likes' you back, one thing will inevitably lead to the other, and before you know it, you're fooling around with each other - literally.

Which brings me back to my first thought about when you actually pop your cherry, and I'm going to do what I originally said I wasn't going to do, and that's answer the question. For me, it depends on your outlook on life, and what you personally think and if you prefer to take James' interpretation of many virginities, or if you prefer the interpretation where you're either a virgin or you're not. Regardless of which interpretation I choose, I still consider myself a virgin because I haven't yet had a boyfriend with whom I have had sex, which I suppose was a mistake admitting on the internet on a blog which most of my friends are probably reading. No matter. Personally, I choose the latter, because that way I don't have to reveal details of my sex life to nosy buggers like you (yes, you over there, in the corner. Yes you. I'm talking to you too, you know).

You also don't have to ask the lady at the foreign currency exchange at Heathrow airport to define 'virgin' - you can simply declare you're not a virgin and that your child next to you is proof of that, but you are in fact flying with Virgin, an awkward and embarrassing true story involving my mother and I on our way out to New York.

Rory.

PS: I have no idea if this is actually what my esteemed colleagues had in mind when the topic 'Virginity' was suggested, but as eli rightly pointed out, for something so simple, it's damn fucking hard to talk about.

PPS: I should apologise for any expletives I may have used in this post, Mel's post inspired me to go and re-watch Bridget Jones and I find the use of language in both films rather fucking contagious.

And the winner is....

Firstly, I should probably point out that I stole the idea for this week from a YouTube collab channel I subscribe to, called The Global Gays, and I sincerely suggest that everybody goes and watches some of their videos because a) they're well made, b) they come from all over the world, c) they're all vaguely good looking and d) one of them tends to post without clothes on.

Secondly, the move to Germany went well, all boxes are unpacked and some sort of order is now being established in this house, even if I have to get used to driving on the wrong side of the road, and giving way to traffic coming from the right.

And now to the bit which everybody has been waiting for.

This week, my esteemed colleagues decided it was high time to find me a boyfriend, there were a number of suggestions, some of them hopefully weren't serious.... to recap, the choices were:

• An Ezra Miller clone
• Mel
• Sherlock / Benedict Cumberbatch
• Merlin / Colin Morgan
• The Doctor / Matt Smith
• David Tennant
• Justin Bieber
• Neil Patrick Harris

An Ezra Miller clone
James, I agree with you that Mr Miller is rather scrumptious, and I would most certainly not object to calling him my boyfriend, but alas, we are talking about a humble clone here, and I'd rather have the original - but thanks for the offer >.< I'll have the clone as my toyboy though!

Mel
There is one fatal problem to this suggestion, I'm afraid Mel - you possess boobs and a vagina in place of a penis and unfortunately, as you pointed out in your post, that's a problem for me....

Sherlock / Benedict Cumberbatch
I saw this suggestion and thought 'brilliant!' But then I sat down to write this post, and I suddenly thought that Sherlock and I would never quite get on with one another... As Todostrieb pointed out, I do possess a vague interest in astrophysics, and Sherlock is completely ignorant of the formation of the solar system. Sorry, that's a no go. Besides, we'd argue too much. Benedict, on the other hand... is ginger and a little old for me, maybe if you were to freeze him until I'm his age, then things might work.

Merlin / Colin Morgan
This is another suggestion I was thrilled with, imagine the spark it would add to our sex lives when Merlin climaxes and it turns out to be a magical incantation which sets the bed on fire or something... Excellent, that's sorted. And then I realised that my cat is called Merlin too, and suddenly it occurred to me that people who know this fact might assume I'm a beastophile when I proudly declare "Merlin's my boyfriend". Actually, that's probably the reason why I'm considering the actors too, I have no objection to Colin Morgan, as long as he can speak in that sexy Merlin voice rather than his natural Irish accent...

The Doctor
I'm going to assume that Mel was referring to the Elevnth when she out this suggestion forward, since it was Eleven's picture she'd added to the post - besides, the previous ten doctors no longer exist. Now don't get me wrong, I'd kill to be the Doctor's companion, in every sense of the word, but I'd get too attached to the one I'm with, I wouldn't get on with the new one after regeneration. In terms of the actors for the doctor, some of them are dead, and I'm no necrophiliac, others simply don't do it for me. Matt Smith, however, I'd not say no too.

David Tennant
Again, I loved this suggestion, but then I re-watched Journey's End from season 4 of Doctor Who, and realised that he was far too hairy. I do however agree with that set of criteria you listed, Todostrieb, of course, the Not Gay part to David Tennant was a problem....

Justin Bieber
Eli, I seriously hope that you were joking when you suggested this.... person. I won't pass judgement on his (lack of) musical talent,  And I'm not sure when I ever said I was into small men...? (I'm not, for the record.) Besides, he looks about twelve years old...

Neil Patrick Harris
Now there's eye candy if there ever was some... And I must correct you, Miu, Neil is engaged to be married (to a rather smexy specimen of a man). Although, my conscience gets the better of me here, I don't want to deprive their kids of their two lovely daddies and destroy their relationship, I prefer monogamy.

And so I must declare Mel to be the winner. That doesn't mean she's now my boyfriend, I'm not sure Eli would let that happen. She put forward the winning suggestion of Colin Morgan, even if she didn't mean to, and has my permission to endulge herself with Jelly Babies and Vodka.

When every straight man's hero turns out to be gay

Yes, I am late, but I want to submit my candidate for Rory's boyfriend.

Name: Neil Patrick Harris

Age: Irrelevant

Hair: Blond

Eyes: Blue

Special features: Awsomeness 

Wikipedia: Neil Patrick Harris is an American actor, singer, director, and magician. Harris was named as one of Time magazine's 100 most influential people in 2010,[2] and was awarded a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in September 2011. 

Why is he the best candidate

• Gay
• Handsome
• Well dressed
• Actor
• Broadway singer and dancer
• Funny
• Charming
• Amazing
• Did I mention Broadway??

Facts to ignore - He is married and has kids... Not to worry! As soon as he sees you Rory it will be love at first sight and will get a divorce. It adds another pro: family guy, kind father.

Still not convinced? Watch this

Or...

Because I love Hugh Jackman :D

I must add a thanks to my boyfriend for showing me these videos... no he is not gay :/

Love,

Miu xx

"If I was your boyfriend..."

Hello from japan. I heard that this week's theme is "find rory a boyfriend". If I am wrong, forgive me. It's hard to be sure without the internet.
In the car today, this song came on in the radio:


                                   It seemed perfect, considering this week's theme.

Here's a brief factfile:

Name: Justin Drew Bieber
-Birth date: March 1, 1994
-Birth place: Stratford, Ontario, Canada
-Eye Color: Brown
-Hair Color: Brown
-Height: 5’3 ½ and growing!
-Parents: Pattie (mom)
-Siblings: sister, Jazmyn
-Pets: One dog (Sammy)
-Super Power Wish: To fly
-Favorite Candy: Sour Patch Kids
-Hidden talent: “I can solve a Rubik’s cube in less than a minute.”
-Nicest gift he’s ever given: “I took my mom on a vacation to Florida.”
-Favorite time of day: Night
-Favorite TV show: Smallville
-Celebrity crush: Beyoncé
-Favorite brand of shoes: Supra
-Favorite brand of toothpaste: Colgate
-Most special fan gift: A set of dog tags.

Why I think he would be a good boyfriend?
a) he explained in his song
b) from looking at who you fancied in the past, I noticed some carracteristics they had in common: musical, shorter than you, slim, slightly foreign... You must agree, he fits in perfectly with that crowd!
c) He's musical,and he'd be able to wake you up with a love-song.
d) he has money and a good career, which is a plus, you must agree:D

However, there's two downsides to him:
a) he's constantly working!
b) You'd have to fight off the fangirls, including Selena (and think of the death-threats you'd recieve!!)

Vote Bieber for your boyfriend, you know you secretly want him to call  you "Baby".

eli x

ps, sorry.. it was all I could think of... :( the Japanese sun has burned out my brains...
pps, feel free to leave a comment and email. I'm away, and won't be able to message back, but I'm sure one of my loyal subjects will be happy to reply for me :D

Ps- I think this post should be renamed 'Lustin' for Justin'- Mel

Rory's Dream Guy

Let me see:

1. Musically talented
2. Doctor Who nerd
3. Tall
4. Likes gummy bears and vodka
5. Brunette (I just automatically pair all blondes with brunettes for some reason, adds variety to their children)
6. Appreciates astrophysics, but hates the rest of the physics field
7. Gay

No one I personally know fits these criteria which I have devised for Rory’s genetically unparalleled mate. The closest of my personal acquaintances only fits four out  of seven :/ however, if I were to go out on a limb here the obvious choice is David Tennant.

Pros:

• Doctor who nerd
• Sexy
• Tallish
• Probably knows a little astrophysics
• Almost everyone likes vodka and gummy bears, so he is likely to
• Brunette with pretty highlights

Cons:

• Not gay
• Not certain of musical prowess, but if all else fails could be lovingly ‘tutored’ by Rory

The not gay problem I suspect is one of the biggest issues that face non-straight people today, some people take offense if they get propositioned by a member of the opposite sex, but, as we all know everyone is actually bisexual (refer all questions to Miu).  Remember, it also works the other way around, you could be totally in love with a girl who regrets to inform you is a lesbian.

Come hither my dear Rory

In short, Rory, begin your stalking now.

Todostrieb

Two Spice Girls Were Named After Mel

It all started one day when Mel was sat at her laptop thinking clever thoughts. Sadly she was interrupted from these clever thoughts by the homo-journalists, who demanded she take time out of her hectic schedule to attend to Rory’s whims. 

Mel muttered to herself darkly, the homo-journalists did not find this unusual as Mel often talked to herself, it was the only way she could get any intelligent conversation. 

Worryingly, Mel’s first thought was "well if he needs a boyfriend, I’ll do it. I volunteer for the good of humanity to show Rory the ropes." Then she remembered, there was a ‘boy’ stipulated somewhere in the homo-journalists request, and sadly she couldn’t quite fill those cough pants cough. 

So the search began. Except, well that fan fiction was looking pretty tempting right now.....and so five hours later Mel was found past her deadline still laughing about Harry Potter And The Methods Of Rationality. 

Then dundundun Mel had one of those moments of pure genius that very few mortals could ever understand. Fan fiction, the answer to all our problems she thought. It is a well known saying in the gay community. In real life- assume straight. In a fandom- assume gay. Thus Mel proposed we match make Rory with some of the slash fan fiction stars.

Identity Code: RORYBF001	Previous pairings: John Watson MBBS (Johnlock), Moriarty (Morlock), Dr Who (Wholock), Molly Hooper (this pairing has no colloquial name, due to it being inherently crap), The Woman.
Height: 6’0
Hotness factor: Infinite
Fandom: Sherlock
Comments: He can deduce me anytime. Strongly suggest Rory proposes now.

Identity Code: RORYBF002	Previous pairings: Arthur Pendragon (Merthur), Uther Pendragon (Incestuous foursomes may be an added bonus Rory), Gwen (ewww), Morgana (slightly less eww), The dragon (we don’t judge).
Height: 6’1
Hotness factor: Magical
Fandom: Merlin
Comments: We all know that magical powers are essential for anal sex of any kind. Have you not read any Drarry?

Identity Code: RORYBF003	Previous pairings: The Tardis (who cares about physical relationships anyway), Rose (it broke our hearts a little), Rory (see our Rory is already in- he like’s Rories), See comments, the list is too long to complete also SPOLIERS.
Height: 5’11.5
Hotness factor: Hello Sexy
Fandom: The Whoverse
Comments: He’s over 900 years old, think of all the time he’s had to perfect his technique. Also, they don’t call him lord for nothing- well hello SIIIR.

Report conclusion:

Mel proposes MERWHOLOCKRORY.....

Reports secondary conclusion: 

Fire Mel from Homojournal for being certifiably insane.

Goodnight folks, thanks for reading.

Mel

Well, that was simple.

Here at Homojournal HQ (which, despite the fact that only 1/6 of us frequent there, I have just decided is Wetherspoons), we have a mission. A mission so important, so universally accepted as the apotheosis of honourable quests, that we at Homojournal aren't quite sure that we can do it. But, for our own sake, we must try.

Our quest?

Finding Rory a boyfriend.

#13: The Boyfriend.

Now, all the other Homojournalists are scratching their heads at this, desperately trying to figure out who Rory would be most suited to, but I, even though I'm on holiday and therefore don't have very much time to think, found this easy. I know what Rory likes.

I know what everyone likes.

Besides, in an earlier post I already said I intended to clone Ezra Miller and keep multiples of him as sex slaves, so I should have one for Rory to take.

Hell, have three.

Yours strangely,

James.

If this fails, I know Rory well enough through text conversations to know which of our schoolmates to drug and present to him in only tight boxers.

How NOT to introduce your boyfriend or girlfriend to the family.

I'd just like to take the time to point out that this week's post comes to you from NEW YORK CITY, which is where I am currently being very overly-excited because I'm about to go and see Wicked on Broadway :D I am also about to go and spend every single penny in my possession (or cent or dollar or whatever they call money in the States), because I can, and how often is it that you're taken to New York for a belated 18th Birthday present?

Oddly enough, the mention of theatre seems like the perfect way for me to start my advice on how not to introduce your boyfriend to your parents. I don't know about you, lovely reader person, but outings to the theatre are rare in my family, and when they do happen, then my mum usually comes with me, because she's the one who's paying. This is therefore an ideal opportunity to blurt out to your parents while on the way to said theatre that you're meeting your boyfriend there, and you took the liberty to pay for his ticket on their credit card.

Of course, that situation isn't true for everybody, but this one probably is: for some, the temptation to invite your boyfriend/girlfriend over for violent sex on the kitchen table during one of those once-in-a-blue-moon periods of being home alone is just too great to resist. Depending on your outlook on life, this can be a good thing, or a bad thing. It's obviously a good thing because you get to have hot steamy love-making time with your other half, in a safe environment where you don't run the risk of being arrested for indecent exposure under a tree in Hyde Park.

It's also good because if your family return early and unnanounced, and they don't yet know you're gay, they certainly will when they walk in on the climax. While this may be awkward, you kill two birds with one stone: you've now come out of the closet, AND they've met your significant other. Of course, if you're home alone, you probably wouldn't confine your antics to the kitchen. Just make sure you've cleaned up after yourselves so that it's not overly obvious when your family return...

If awkward moments like that aren't your thing, or you think that one of your family members might come after you with a machete, you might go for the more subtle "Mum, Dad, this is my fuckbuddy, Greg" route. Clearly this is the safer option - at least you won't get an STD or Salmonella from your poorly maintained kitchen table. Then again, this still doesn't eliminate the possibility of being chased half naked down the street by your machete wielding father, so all in all, any way of introducing your boyfriend or girlfriend to the family is looking slim.

Perhaps the only sensible option worth considering is to not introduce them at all. Clearly if you live in one of those dysfunctional familes where machetes and AK-47s look like they could be genuine possibilities, apart from seeking professional help, it might be safer for all those involved that you just don't introduce him or her to your charming relations. Anyway, once you've left home and moved in with your fuckbuddy, you're free to have your violent kitchen sex without the risk of anybody walking in, and then everybody's happy.

I realise some of the scenarios in this post were a bit extreme, I confess I was slightly drunk when writing this, the creative part of my brain got the better of me. I'll be back in England next week, I'm sure I'll report on my fabulous state side excursion in more detail over the coming weeks :P In the meantime, feel free to send a detailed report of your other half's awkward introduction to the family* to homojournal@gmail.com. And if your experiences have been even more alarming than those I've suggested here, do write us a guest article and send that to the same e-mail address!

* machete not required.

How Not to introduce you gay lover to your parents…

Many say that a good, healthy relationship is one where you can be completely open with everyone, and one that you do not need to hide from people. Sure, you may get some kind of kick from hiding it, but for the most part, it will just end up tearing you up inside. You will end up having to hide your emotions around the house and will be unable to seek comfort when things go wrong. You will at some point have to lie to your beloved parents and you could lose their trust, if they ever find out about it all.

<3

But there are cases, when it is important that you do hide it, for example:

• If you are not self-sufficient, and risk being kicked out
• If being found out would put you in any sort of physical danger
• If it could lead to loosing your job (illegal in the UK I think…)

Ways in which you could hide your relationship

•  Lock your phone, password protect everything
• Avoid doodling their name on everything
• Swear that you two are just REALLY REALLLY good friends
• Always deny
• Don’t post about anything concerning your relationship on facebook, or any other social network site
• Delete your internet history
• Limit the amount of people that know. Only tell those you can trust to keep it a secret.
• Don’t show PDA
• Control when you are seen together in public
• Don’t talk about her/him more than you would any other friend
• Make sure your siblings don’t find out
• Keep your sex toys in a locked box.. and the lube.

Useful websites:

How to keep your parents from knowing you have a boyfriend or girlfriend

how to be in a relationship without your parents knowing

How to have a secret relationship

How to keep a boyfriend that your parents don't like

How to hide a girlfriend if your parents don't like her

how to hide a lesbian relationship

Other websites: 

How to have a healthy gay relationship

Information about gay men coming out of heterosexual relationships

Convince your parents to let you marry the girl of your choice

How to introduce your girlfriend to your parents

Taking your (gay) boyfriend home to meet your parents

Forum: How to introduce your boyfriend/girlfriend to your family

Video: how to introduce your (lesbian) girlfriend to your parents

...................................

To me, it appears that if you are in a situation at home, where you would be kicked out and your safety and comfort could be compromised, it may be best not to be in a relationship. I know, you lurrrveee him. But hard as it is to accept, we have to remember that teenage relationships don’t last forever, and you can have all that messing around, when you leave home (perhaps when you go to university), when you can find your own lgbt circle to support you and be there for you, if your parents disown you. Right now it’s too much of a risk. Self-preservation in the short term is the most important. Be patient.

That being said, I haven’t been in that situation. I can’t really judge. So I hope that all the websites I’ve listed are helpful to anyone that really needs it. 


eli x


ps, I have guest-slave in mind that I will hopefully be able to blackmail into writing a post about her cousin's experience... so will try to get that posted in the near future

Spiders, Monkey Brains and Casserole...

The household of Mel is full of Kauai wolf spiders. Not literally, although, I have always wanted a pet tarantula. I mean that, in terms of family relationships we seem to be modelled on this breed of spider instead of Homo sapiens. After mating and conceiving the female tries to eat the male. Luckily my dad has infinite patience and can hold his own. In times of stress or starvation the mother will eat her young. My sisters and I have learnt to avoid my mum while she is dieting. In return when we grow old enough to leave the nest, we too will turn cannibal and eat our parents as a send off.  In other words we don’t get on well.

Say what you like. I think spiders are cute.

Don’t get me wrong, my family of spiders belongs together, who else would buy me a kilo of apples a day? All I’m saying is that we’re not exactly close in the traditional sense. As a result, my mum and I play a game of secrets. The rules of the game are as follows: admit to nothing, give her no information about your life, steal all the teaspoons/keys/plums and see which entertaining events follow.  I never introduce boyfriends or girlfriends willingly. If anyone has read my particular awkward and overdramatic coming out post, you will know that my family drew blood from a stone, discovered the Holy Grail and moved Everest to England before they found out my sexuality.

I have great respect for those families who share every aspect of each other’s lives. I’m sure it’s not all roses and peacocks, so I’m not particularly jealous. But, I must admit, I am curious as to what it would be like to come home and tell my mum or dad everything that had happened that day. I have a friend like that, her relationship with and inability to lie to her mother once resulted in her announcing that she had helped me choose a thong to buy whilst they were eating casserole one evening.

Anyway (I say anyway a lot in posts don’t I?), what I mean to say is that I tend not to introduce my boyfriends or girlfriends at all. After I am inevitably outed by my traitorous bitch of a sister, I’m normally teased for several months at family meals until the next scandal. Granted, any teasing is interrupted by strange debates, arguments or disgusting scientific revelations that only my mum and I enjoy discussing. Did you know that it’s harder for a guy to pee when his bladder is not completely full than it is for a girl? That was an interesting Sunday roast, there were diagrams.  However, all teasing is in good humour. My family works in a sort of Darwinian way, you grow a thick skin around the age of twelve or you spend all your time crying.

The introducing of boyfriends (a girlfriend has never been formally introduced as anything other than a friend) always feels more like offering up human sacrifice. The position of the moon, food and activities has to be chosen perfectly. The boy in question normally squirms and tries to get out of it, having heard my stories of my wolf spider mum. However, in a technique that has taken fifty years of practice, my mum then makes me look like an exaggerating idiot by being really incredibly nice. Do not be fooled. The wolf spiders dig traps, before you realise it, it is too late and both your legs are missing.

I remain, absolutely and 100% sure,
that mummy spider is waiting for my engagement party
to serve my beloved chilled monkey brains Indiana Jones Style.  

In other news, I mentioned in my coming out week post that I was going to come out to my little sister, who I thought may be joining me in the LGBTQ community. Well, I came out to her in my typically awkward fashion. She promptly ignored it and got a boyfriend. My gaydar is, as ever, sadly misguided. 

As always feel free to comment or email at homojournal@gmail.com. We'll be back next week with our Jubilee themed posts...I have a little something about the Queen's knickers planned and hopefully Todostrieb will do us a spiffy patriotic homojournal banner. 

Giant Puddles Are Fun

Straight crushes, I’m sure we’re beginning to sound very much like a broken record, but it is yet another topic I have little experience in.  All of the rejections I have received I can assure you have been based solely on my personality. The girl I jokingly asked to prom told me “it’s not your gender it’s your personality”. She was probably joking too, to be fair I can be a bitch though, and now I have a boyfriend so really it all worked out roses.

Once upon a time a few of my friends had crushes on me, obviously they all have terrible taste, while I still thought I was straight. Having been in this situation my advice is; don’t be afraid to tell them, I was happier to know and did my best to avoid actions which may have hurt them further. Having a crush is not going to ruin a friendship, if they are truly your friend whom they crush on should not be an issue – the worst that can happen is changing in front of them is a little awkward (but I’m told guys seldom do that anyways). One awkward conversation is worth the potential gains, it’s a possibility you’ll get rejected, I can’t lie, but you never know – they might be willing to give it a try, or are secretly harbouring the mirror of your crush and are too scared to do anything. If the worst comes to the worst don’t be a stalker about it, give yourself some space and time to get over it (ensure you have adequately explained your feelings on the matter though, it hurts to have a friend ignore you without knowing why). Sometimes dragging it out is unnecessary torture to you. It may seem like this is the end of your friendship, your life, or the world. But in a few years you’ll look back and laugh, and if they’re a true friend they’ll be sitting next to you laughing too. Or, if they’re a best friend, at the bar buying a round of drinks.

New life ambition.

My advice to anyone whose friend confesses affection/crush/undying love: don’t be a dick. Seriously, I know where you live.

Lots of love,

Todostrieb

OMG! Is that a Stereotype I see??

Well hello there special followers (I'm hoping there is at least 1 person following us :P)

We have now reached the much awaited weekend and on this fabulous Saturday morning I am here to discuss the stereotypical subject of stereotypes! I said fabulous cause I could see this tiny ray of sunlight peering through my bedroom shades; little did I know that - England being what it is -  when I opened the shades the sun had been covered by a thick sheet of clouds and it is now raining. Oh English weather… it always lives up to stereotypes don't you think?

Do not fear! I will not fall into the (yet other) stereotype of English people always talking about the weather; let me enlighten you. My name is Miu, no it is not a typical name and no I am not sure it is even real but that is not the point. I am the straight (at least 99% so) token/mascot of this insane group of non-hetero entities. I chose to write on Saturdays because, let it be said, it is the BEST day. I am 18 and NOT English, so what am I? Well that is a very good question that even the most esteemed philosophers or scientists have not been able to answer, so let it just be said that I am… [missing to protect identity]  or more simply: I just AM. To quote my dear friend (and by "friend" I mean "that idiot!") Descartes "Ego sum. Ego existo. (I am. I exist.)" Though I'm not even sure about that!

Now back to the point. Stereotypes. Most people hate them. Why? Because they are a way of passing judgement on a person merely based on ethnicity, gender, culture, religion, colour, height… and many many others. And of course, we insecure little humans just hate to be judged! I mean seriously, everyone around us is judging us in someway or another; even you are judging me in this exact moment while reading this blog. You are deciding whether I am just a crazed teenager or in need of serious medical attention. On the other hand you may also be considering how awesome I am, in which case carry on. The fact is, we do not hate the "nice" stereotypes. I don't see any African man going around saying: "Hey! How dare you say I have a big penis!?" But I do hear Indian/Japanese guys crying out: "its not true! Its not true!"
I once heard someone say (or probably just read it on FB)

"I live three lives:
○ The one I live everyday
○ The one people say I live
○ And the one my parents think I live"

Now I found that quite funny, as I too seem to live three lives - though probably even more. What about you? If it does apply to you then sorry honey, but you are a stereotypical teenager (or human being)! Now why did I used "stereotypical" rather than just "typical"? No matter the definition (thank you James!) they essentially have the same meaning. What makes us hate it so much is the negative connotations that come with it. We don't want to be put in a closed box. It is when people only see the stereotype and refuse to see the real person that it all becomes really annoying. But stereotypes aren't bad in themselves.

I tend to consider myself as...unique. I am not you r typical gal. Yet even I have fallen into a stereotype. I'm sitting at my desk writing on a blog while spinning around in my chair and lovingly wearing my boyfriend's oversized hoodie to comfort me while he is away! Nevertheless, stereotypes exist for a reason. Although most are not accurate, people really tend to behave similarly. It's a fact that most English people have their 5 o'clock tea. Call it stereotype, tradition or culture, in the end there's not much difference.

Either way I still find it amazing when you meet that ONE person who fits a stereotype perfectly! I think they are a rare endangered species that should be protected… or locked up - I mean looked after - in a museum for people to watch!

I think you've had enough of me by now so I will leave you to hopefully start a debate on whether what I said is utter bullshite (not a typo, read it as appropriate) or incredibly clever or perhaps insane. The latter tends to include the other two into one.

Do not despair, I'll be back next week!

Love,

Miu

P.S. Don't forget to e-mail us at homojournal@gmail.com for any questions, comments, request or if you are bored and have nothing better to do. We are available 24/7 (that is 24 minutes every 7 hours) so try your luck!

P.P.S. [ok that's a total lie that was true erm... a few days ago... now well... just drunk typing on the computer while my other fellow bloggers are getting off with each other LOL what a stereotype right?]