PDA's, yay, nay or different for gay?

Alas, I did not come up with that title myself. ('Alas' was one of the words I used to help me remember the amino acid 'Alanine, Ala' on my last exam, you can probably guess the reasons for the post muddle up).

PDA's? Never! How dare you show that much wrist in public...DEAR GOD, is that an ankle I see? *Swoon*

One is not amused

My real opinion on PDA's? Go for it, do what you like, when you like where you like. If there are children around keep it PG, but realistically even 3 year olds have seen Megara and Hercules snog, so, decency is a little different to what it once was.

If you're gay, black white, or a rainbow stripe flying fish, same applies.

Of course, it's your choice, people have different levels of comfort with the touchy feely stuff, especially in public. I mean sure, if this world was Mel land it would be a den of decadence and nerdiness in nearly equal measures (also pizza). But, sadly I am yet to come into my magical inheritances, despite being of age. Moral of the story, until I am your unquestioned leader (best put it in your diary for next thursday) then do as you please kind sirs.

Now, onto Mel's real topic of the week, her next exam. Excitable tissues, sadly a lot less exciting as the name promises. If only the dreary drudgery of multiple choice questions would be broken by affection of any kind. Alas (my new word of the day) I am left with the emotionless voice of Dr H and my hundreds of flash cards.

Lots of Love Mel

PS//

Pain fibres:

'C'  Carry Crude touch
'A' pain Arises Abruptly and is blocked by Asphyxiation

Enjoy those pain fibres you hardcore rebel, you...

Cinderella You Shall Go to the Prom

Ah, Year 13 prom. I can almost smell the clouds of hairspray, fake tan and perfume now.  After being disappointingly single at my last prom, this year I'm going all out. Think Big Fat Gypsy Weddings prom dress and gold KG lilah flat gladiator sandals. Luckily for me I’m blessed with Eli as my date. Unluckily for my Nan, it appears as if I am unable to snag a guy for longer than a week, due to some horrific personality flaw or physical deformity.

This is me. You may recognise me from such films as Toy Story 1, 2 and 3.

In my head Eli is a Japanese version of Mulan. I am Belle. Although, granted I only decided on Belle because she is the nerdiest princess. I tried to find a picture to illustrate our princessness but am now scarred for life, tip don’t Google the word lesbian in front of your childhood heroes. In reality I will look more like a potato standing next to Megan Fox....I guess what I’m trying in my roundabout way to say here is that my Prom preparations are much the same as last time round, when I didn't have a date female or otherwise. The only difference is I have shorter hair so the up-do is no longer a necessity and that when my extended family ask if I have a date I stretch the truth a little. I find “No I don’t have a boy friend at the moment” is a nice skirting of the having a girlfriend part of my life.

Doing it the Essex way. Luckily my bitch haircut saves me from the chaviness.

Now, as for my close family, I cheerily admitted going to prom with Eli. My mum said this was the only way I’d be able to look a normal size, when all the other girls will be wearing heels and all the guys I know are now taller than me. My dad told me to make sure I took lots of pictures. A few of us are staying at Eli’s house, so we’re all getting ready together. Not many girls can say their partners advised on make-up, laced them into their corsets and helped test perfumes.

I have no fear of actual prom night, most of my teachers know I have a girlfriend. If they don’t well, they’ll soon find out and hopefully it will be a secondary paedophilia deterrent. All my school friends already know, and I’m supporting the foundation of a Eli and Mel fanclub, so no worries on that front. Perhaps there is a small part of me conditioned to believe that at least one of us should be wearing a tux. On the other hand, after having a dream in which Eli and I got married, both wearing white poofy dresses and walking down the aisle together, I can feel some of my social conditioning slipping away.

A quick word for our less fortunate LGBT brethren. When exploring ideas for this post I came across this title on the guardian website “School cancels prom over fear of lesbians”. Dear lord, fear? What do they think we’re going to do to them? Essentially a girl wanted to bring her girlfriend as a date to prom, so it got cancelled. This doesn't seem any different to when black people were barred from clubs or Jewish people were barred from restaurants. If you agree with that, politely put, you are a lemon and I'm glad that your prom got cancelled because you didn't deserve it. Any lesbians are welcome to come with me and Eli. We will stage a lesbian prom take over, eat everyone’s toes and use their eyebrows for our witchcraft. Luckily this story did spawn some rather funny motivational posters, I have included for your enjoyment.

Much love, white wine, balloons and dancing,

Your Mel x

Why of course my ideal boyfriend is my current boyfriend... *shifty look*

I've been asked this question many times, and many times I have even asked myself, but I am yet to find an answer. I don't believe I have a "type", which I guess is not necessarily the same as an "ideal boyfriend" but I'll think about that later. Are there any traits that I particularly prefer in a guy's looks? Duh! I tend to like them dark (light brown/olive not necessarily black), muscly arms, nicely shaped abs though not too much, tall, handsome, with long (wavy or straight) dark hair with light coloured (blue/green/grey you pick) big eyes and nice full lips… *mouth starts watering*

Of course this only works in theory as somehow I have ended up with this very pale, blond and skinny kid who has little resemblance to a MAN (I love you hun!! xx).  My point is… does it really matter? Perhaps it is just me, but when it comes to actual boyfriends… I really don't care if they are not the hottest person on this Earth! I like them for what they are inside. Cliché I know. Don't get me wrong, I don't think my boyfriend is this hideous human being that should be kept in a dark room, handcuffed to the bed for all eternity… well actually I don't mind that idea! But… what was I talking about again?

I can't say he has gone TOTALLY wrong, I mean, he does have hypnotising blue eyes, lovely full lips, and - once upon a time - this long silky hair (I do like long hair when it suits the person perfectly!) But he is not what I consider aesthetically ideal. Then again I guess we must all learn to  "settle", we will never get the most gorgeous guy we can think of; perfection in flesh DOES NOT EXIST. No matter what Descartes says *faking annoying voice*  "in order to be perfect it must exist"... oh please! I can yearn for this guy as much as I want

Ian Somerhalder (aka Damon Salvatore in Vampire Diaries) who I just love to bits 

But I am not going to get him am I!? So I'll have to just settle with this

Well... there is a slight resemblance (NOT)

Nevertheless, hey, if you have to settle for the looks at least you can ace the personality right!? I don't believe we all want some gorgeous guy who proves himself to be a total and absolute dickhead...maybe. So let's see… what qualities would I like in a guy… These are my top 5 (not necessarily in order, that is asking too much)

1. Intelligent. Nothing is worse than a brainless guy. I am a clever girl (ok so maybe what I really mean is a nerd), so I will need a guy who understands my nerd talk and fantastic IB jokes.
2. Funny. Always go for the one that makes you laugh! Plus I also heard/read somewhere that laughter will increase your life span (no I don't believe it but… better safe than sorry right?)
3. Kind.  I wouldn't want to be with a guy who hits me, but with kind I don't only mean to me, but in general, to people and/or animals. It warms my heart to see a guy giving his change to charity or just some random person on the street asking politely.
4. Passionate. Well… what can I say? You read it in my post last week (if you didn't you better go and do it now!!)
5. Authentic. Of course all the above won't matter if it is not for real! People who fake their personalities are really the worst. You are your own person, don't convince people to like you for being something different, cause then they wouldn't really like YOU so what's the point? 

So Mr. Perfect can only be so if he is real. Contradiction (read above)? No. What I mean is, you can fantasise all you want about who your ideal boyfriend may be, but if you give yourself unrealistic expectations, you will never find him! A perfect boyfriend is one that DOES have flaws. You may love some of those so called flaws (I know I do), or find them immensely annoying, but in the end you would not want him any different because… he/she just wouldn't be the same without them (I know I've mostly been talking about "he" but that's just cause I'm straight and like guys so don't take it as an offence, same applies for the other sex). On the other hand, if you don't think so and feel the need to change all his flaws in order to make him "perfect", well then, I truly believe you should consider getting a different boyfriend. If you don't like him, don't be with him. Simple. No buts!

So, yeah, my boyfriend is not perfect, far from it in fact, but he is good enough, or good enough for me (maybe) which is really all that matters (for now). Would I have him any different? Naah, where would the fun be in that?

That's all I can tell you for today (<-- that's a lie, if you want to hear more do e-mail!), so I'll leave you with a quote from The Jungle Book (if you don't like Disney you are an incomplete person and I feel very sorry for you):

"Don't spend your time looking around

For something you want that can't be found

When you find out you can live without it

And then go along not thinking about it

I'll tell you something true

The bare necessities of life will come to you" 

Love,

Miu xx

P.S. Don't forget to e-mail us at homojournal@gmail.com for any questions, comments, request or if you are bored and have nothing better to do. We are available 24/7 (that is 24 minutes every 7 hours) so try your luck!