Dom: The person who inflicts the pain/pleasure and is in
control. Otherwise known as domme (for female doms). Often given a nickname
dependant on the level of the dom/sub relationship e.g. daddy or sir
Sub: The submissive, can be known as pet or slave, again
dependant on the level of relationship.
Scene: A scene is a one time bdsm experience - it is possible
to enact scenes with people you may not have an intimate relationship with.
Collaring: sub/dom pairs who do more than just the
occasional scene may choose to literally put a collar on the sub, as a sign
they are in that kind of relationship, normally used by more serious couples.
Munch: A meet up of many like minded people who want to meet
potential new dom/subs or just socialise.
Sensation play: literally playing with the senses, normally
involves cutting one off (such as using blindfolds) and different textures and
temperatures, like ice and hot wax.
Edge play: the dangerous stuff: knives and blood basically
Contract: despite its reputation for danger and abuse, the
people who are serious about this lifestyle are normally very careful to ensure
that all parties involved are safe; this sometimes involves a literal contract
before, stating what will happen if things do actually go wrong
Soft limits: any experienced dom/sub will have a list of
things they do and don’t like, just because you like some aspects of bdsm doesn’t
mean you’re going to like them all. A soft limit is something you’re concerned
about but would be willing to try given the right situation. For example a dom
might be unwilling to try using proper whips until they felt they had adequate training.
Hard limits: things you would never consider. It’s an abuse
of trust for a dom to break a hard/soft limit without prior permission.
Safe word: sometimes things do just get too much, a sub or
even a dom can yell a word and everything will stop, at once. My favourites are
physics related, no one will ever mistake “thermodynamics” as a cry of passion.
When using gags often a bell can be used as a substitute for a safe word. NEVER
PLAY WITHOUT A SAFEWORD READY!
Vanilla: refers to inexperience, such as a dom or sub new to the lifestyle. Can also refer to non bdsm relationships/sex, a dom or sub may choose to have 'vanilla' sex from time to time.
Vanilla: refers to inexperience, such as a dom or sub new to the lifestyle. Can also refer to non bdsm relationships/sex, a dom or sub may choose to have 'vanilla' sex from time to time.
Play safe my little readers,
Todostrieb
