Drawing on my limited experience

Having never really engaged in PDA I also feel somewhat under qualified for this post but I'll give it a go.

When my girlfriend and I first started dating I had not been 'out' for very long and so was slightly uncomfortable engaging in PDA (which my awesome girlfriend was awesome about). But now we are both at university and often don't see each other for 6 weeks at a time (which really sucks) so I am going to take advantage of all of the 46 hours I will see her for next weekend and f**k what anyone else thinks.

Despite that, there is a limit of what anyone needs to see any couple doing, regardless of their gender, and there does reach a point where you maybe need to relocate to a slightly more private location. (for the reference of everyone ever - under a tree does not count because we can still see you!)

Becky

Embarrassing moments

I am currently locked outside my house, sitting on the pavement as I wait for a locksmith. People walk by and look at me suspiciously; I wonder what they might be thinking. Now, before you start judging too, let me clearly state that none of this was my fault.

My very clever boyfriend had stayed over at my house. The next morning I had duties to fulfil at the Zoo, so we head out around 9:30. However, on our way out of the door my dear clever boyfriend decides it would be a good idea to leave the keys in the lock while closing the door behind him! Granted he did not do it on purpose (I would hope), we are now stuck outside, with a key which is now worthless and no phones. In fact, my door is one of those silly doors which automatically locks when you close it and cannot be opened if there is already a key inserted on the other side. Fortunately the wi-fi still reaches and he was able to look up and call a locksmith using Skype; the miracles of modern technology.

Anyway, sitting outside looking like a hobo-burglar (hobo = homeless)I receive an SOS cry from Rory who found himself unable to write his posts and asking me to cover for him. Due to my situation, I highly doubt this will be possible, however I began thinking about Public Displays of Affection and what possible reasons we might have to discuss them. Of course I have not read any of my fellow homojournalists, but I came up with two main reasons why PDA may be a source of "anxiety"(or however you want to call it):

1. Personal Embarrassment - When your boyfriend/girlfriend is just plain embarrassing like mine so you just don't want to be associated with them and you either pretend you don't know them or are just friends. Quite horrid and non-sensical stuff really. Why be with someone if you are embarrassed of them? Unless you are into the secrecy of an adultery. Hence why I don't ACTUALLY avoid being seen with the clever guy who locked me out of my house! Though he often does embarrass me a little bit, I don't mind it too much cause I'm not embarrasse OF him. One small two-letter word makes a huuuge difference. I wouldn't change him for anything v.v
2. Societal Disapproval - The reason why I'm guessing this theme made it's way to the "theme pool". Getting back on the LGBT theme, people often stare and judge when they see two people of the same sex engaging in PDAs. Many, in fact, feel insulted when they witness such effusions. I say f***k them. One should never be ashamed to be themselves, which should inlude being yourself with your "other half", come on people! You should not care what THEY think, they have nothing to do with you. 

Whichever the reason, get over it and just be happy. Obviously KEEP IT LEGAL, but apart from that, don't be ashamed to show how you feel about someone. If you are still nervous, try after a few drinks ;)

Yeah... that's really all I have to say. Btw I did eventually get access to my house again, in case you were wondering. Also, by now I'm kind of tipsy so kind of not thinking straight and I really want to finish watching Juno so bye bye.

Love,

Miu xx

P.S. no, this post was not written in one go.

We need to talk about PDA.. or maybe not

Throughout this week, I have been pestering random people about their opinions on PDA. The most frequent answer I got was "What, them gadgety thingies?". To most, PDA = personal digital assistants...
People don't really care about public displays of affection. Or maybe, that's just an unused term in England. Once I explain to the said people, the common answer was "Why should you care about what other people think? If I want to kiss my gf/bf, I will".

Opportunistic PDA >.< 'T'is like the only times me and Rafaello are the same height......  

I'm not too keen on PDA. My slight aversion to PDA stems from the modest asian mixed with my conservative grandmother's teachings, and my bitter periods of single-ness, in which the mere sight of couples, casually PDA-ing brought out the lime-jello monster in me. I'd see couples EVERYWHERE. I used to stare daggers. That habit has stuck.

Although, currently I am happy, I don't see couples much at all.  (jesus, I'm beginning to sound like a crazy person.. "I see PDA...... all the time") . The only couples that have come to my attention are those that go over-the-top, and are in the way.

Last week, on the tube, this something like this happened... and they blocked the door I was supposed to leave through :'(

So, YAY for PDA, but keep it PG, don't go over the top and make people awkward. As for lgbt PDA, I don't mind it. I like lgbt PDA, I find it cute, and it's spreading awareness. Why should you be ashamed, just because you're lgbt? (gee, perhaps I'm a hypocrite?). When me and Mel dated, I suppose we must have made some people awkward e.g. our deputy-head of sixth form college... urk. I never had any bad experiences with LGBT PDA, however, there are still communities out there, who react negatively to shows of homosexuality. If you do feel like PDA is putting you in any kind of danger, it's probably best to keep it private. Holding hands is not worth getting beat up over... or is it? 

In April 2011, there was a protest at a pub in Soho that kicked out a gay couple for "obscene kissing"...

read guardian article

Damn, I think I rambled again. 
Hopefully, I made some sense.. somewhere. 
Till next time,

Eli

That bitch stole my title

I think this is always going to be a case of use your common sense. It doesn't really bother me, apart from watching Mel, who is my actual sister, or Eli who is like my sister…

That doesn't mean to say that it’s okay to whip out the handcuffs on a trip to the local shopping mall though, think moderation. There might be kids watching you. In fact, this should be something that puts you off.

I confess I am probably guilty of too much PDA in the sixth form common room, but that was ages ago. But hey, I have to creep out ex-boyfriends and mark my territory somehow right?  James mentioned parties, I'm not sure if that actually counts as public or not, in our group of friends coming across a mating pair is no cause for alarm. 

No alarm here. 

In respect to LBGT I'm of the opinion your orientation shouldn't matter, do what you like, but if people are actually offended/ feel awkward because of your behaviour (for non-homophobic reasons) it’s still polite to stop. And if you really have to be within a 2cm radius of your significant other at all times, why did you agree to go out where there are other people, especially friends who might demand some of your precious attention? Living in bed is the answer, with slaves to bring you food and drink. 

I've been doing some research on this topic, and apparently LBGT’s find PDA to be a minefield of issues. It’s sad that we live in a world where you might not feel safe holding someone’s hand. I like to think attitudes are slowly changing, in England you’re definitely more likely to be glared at than openly harassed, which is an improvement on a few years ago I'm sure. My advice to you, if someone is glaring skip off into the sunset still holding hands and forget about them.

:'(

Lots of love,

Todostrieb

P.s. Mike wanted an honorary mention, so here it is: we kissed in public once and the kraken only temporarily threatened to destroy Chelmsford, but was tamed by my great and terrible beauty. 

I feel underqualified for my blog post, hooray.

Public displays of affection (one of the many-varied terms shortened to that most put-upon of acronyms, P.D.A), are a sort of grey area for me. I mean, I've had experience of displays of affection, yes, but very few of them ever really public, per se, and so I don't really know what to write about.

So this should be fun.

To be fair, I'm always like this.

If, by "public", we include parties, then I at least have something to write about. Last week I mentioned a party me and Cretzal attended (the one where he didn't sing "Kiss From A Rose" to me), and we kissed a couple of times then (rendering the father's clueless naïvety even more inexplicable). No-one threw drinks at us or drew pentagrams round us, but we were among friends, so they'd at least have asked permission to do so beforehand anyway.  

And, due to my somewhat static love-life, that's most of my experience covered. I mean, I've been kissed in bars/pubs, but always with either my friends Mike (of Todostrieb fame) and Jyoti (of no Homojournal fame whatsoever) nearby to protect me/cheer me on, or by someone large enough to punch any annoyances into atoms anyway. I've kissed someone else round  one of my other friend's houses, but everyone else was watching a movie and we were at the back of the room, so it was hardly primetime viewing. I'm really not very qualified for this.

Why can't this week be about the Potash Development  Association, or Personal Digital Assistants?

...well. Once, me and a friend, who I shall give the moniker "Joey", strayed into P.D.A territory. In the park with friends, we held hands. Nothing exploded (get your mind out of the gutter), no-one got shot (stop it), and there were no screams (I give up). Afterwards, we went back to his, and you don't get to know about that because, while affectionate, it wasn't public, so ner-ner-ne-ner-ner. 

On the way home the next day, we held hands on the bus, and we kissed repeatedly. There were feral youths on the bus, as well as elderly females, and neither group paid us any more attention than they would a heterosexual couple, or a black man carrying shopping. We were accepted, which was extraordinarily lovely.

And I suppose that's all I can say on the matter, really. Once, I engaged in true PDA, and I didn't get singled out as a witch or a heathen, and I think it should (and possibly will be) the same for all our readers.

Yours happily,

James

Me: I need to think of a pseudonym for Joey.
Brain: Try his middle name on Facebook.
Me: Ah yes, a foolproof plan.

I'd make a crap spy.