Mr Potter, Our New Celebrity

Tell me what would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?

If you know the answer to that off the top of you head, stop reading now, turn off your computer and get a life. Here's a short clip for you, because there is absolutely nothing that is not sexy about Pf. Snape / Alan Rickman.

Anyway, our topic of the week is gay celebrities. In a strange twist of fate none of the actors in the Harry Potter films are openly gay (none that showed up in a google search anyway). Is this because of discrimination in the acting world? Maybe. Is this because actors are the best at hiding their sexuality with their mysterious wiles and ability to lie with their entire bodies? Maybe. Is it because roughly 10 % of the population are gay and there's only about 20 actors the average person can name in the film series? Most likely. I'd bet my money on some of the smaller roles being filled by our fellow LGBTs.

I did uncover some interesting rumours about Daniel Radcliffe's sexuality though. I always knew Harry and Draco were destined to be together. If only the slash pairings that existed online also existed in real life.

This brings me onto my main point.

Ben Whishaw is of course, the main point of life.

There’s a lively and ongoing internet debate about whether Whishaw is gay. The general supposition is that he is – based mainly on the fact that he gave an interview to the gay magazine Out not long ago. Whishaw, himself, though, isn’t saying anything.-The Telegraph

I don't see how I can be frustrated about his lack of public speeches regarding his sexuality (as I've managed to convince half the people I know I'm gay, a quarter that I'm straight, and a quarter that I'm bisexual) but somehow I am.

In his interview with OUT magazine (homojournalists may enjoy the website, which has interviews and ideas for venturing out of the house etc) he speaks about the importance of gay role models for young people. He goes on to speak about sexuality being a transitional thing, that he felt he was in the middle of at the moment. I promptly felt guilty for pushing him to chose a team...even though I have never contacted him in any way. Standing outside his house admiring his new curtains doesn't count as contact does it?

Anyway it occurred to me that all the stress we feel when coming out, is magnified hundreds of times if your famous. There's increased pressure to be a role model (so no stumbling drunk out of G-A-Y in the early hours of Saturday morning), and you don't just have to deal with the reactions of those close to you but also those on the other side of the world. Maybe actors as a breed are also more into self exploration etc? If you spend all day pretending to be somebody else, perhaps it takes a little longer to work out who you really are.

So in conclusion I will with great reluctance leave Ben Whishaw to his own devices. (OK I'll admit to the occasional google). But, if he and Daniel Craig were to get married, I would die of happiness. They may in addition to being one of my OTPs as Bond/Q also have made it to my list of real life OTPs as Whishaw/Craig.

I just want to eat him? Is that so wrong?

Lots of Love Mel

Ps// No post script today

Fifty Shades of Gay

I know this post is supposed to be about virginity, and it is, vaguely. I’d like to quote fifty shades of grey at you here “and then he ripped through my virginity”. I’d like to assure readers this doesn’t happen, and if it does it’s not a good thing. Even most submissives don’t like agonising pain for the hell of it. I am of the opinion that your first sexual experience shouldn't be with a man twice your age, who your not actually in any kind of relationship with. Call me old fashioned, I may not believe sex before marriage will get you smitten down by god, but I think there should always be some emotion behind sex. 

My main problem with the book is it’s whiny, yes I’ve read worse fan fiction, but the characters are over dramatic and the entire plot is unrealistic. Also it’s not rape, but it doesn’t actually portray a proper BDSM lifestyle you’re given the impression Mr. Grey is an experienced dom, but he loses control and spanks whatsherface without her consent, and without a safe word. This is pretty much abuse, and such a lapse in control does not make for a good dominant.

I still have high hopes for the film though.

Here is some better BDSM twilight fan fiction if you are this way inclined:

To Serve is Divine

Outtakes

Switches and Subs

Todostrieb

P.s sorry this post is late, I was ill L

Two Spice Girls Were Named After Mel

It all started one day when Mel was sat at her laptop thinking clever thoughts. Sadly she was interrupted from these clever thoughts by the homo-journalists, who demanded she take time out of her hectic schedule to attend to Rory’s whims. 

Mel muttered to herself darkly, the homo-journalists did not find this unusual as Mel often talked to herself, it was the only way she could get any intelligent conversation. 

Worryingly, Mel’s first thought was "well if he needs a boyfriend, I’ll do it. I volunteer for the good of humanity to show Rory the ropes." Then she remembered, there was a ‘boy’ stipulated somewhere in the homo-journalists request, and sadly she couldn’t quite fill those cough pants cough. 

So the search began. Except, well that fan fiction was looking pretty tempting right now.....and so five hours later Mel was found past her deadline still laughing about Harry Potter And The Methods Of Rationality. 

Then dundundun Mel had one of those moments of pure genius that very few mortals could ever understand. Fan fiction, the answer to all our problems she thought. It is a well known saying in the gay community. In real life- assume straight. In a fandom- assume gay. Thus Mel proposed we match make Rory with some of the slash fan fiction stars.

Identity Code: RORYBF001	Previous pairings: John Watson MBBS (Johnlock), Moriarty (Morlock), Dr Who (Wholock), Molly Hooper (this pairing has no colloquial name, due to it being inherently crap), The Woman.
Height: 6’0
Hotness factor: Infinite
Fandom: Sherlock
Comments: He can deduce me anytime. Strongly suggest Rory proposes now.

Identity Code: RORYBF002	Previous pairings: Arthur Pendragon (Merthur), Uther Pendragon (Incestuous foursomes may be an added bonus Rory), Gwen (ewww), Morgana (slightly less eww), The dragon (we don’t judge).
Height: 6’1
Hotness factor: Magical
Fandom: Merlin
Comments: We all know that magical powers are essential for anal sex of any kind. Have you not read any Drarry?

Identity Code: RORYBF003	Previous pairings: The Tardis (who cares about physical relationships anyway), Rose (it broke our hearts a little), Rory (see our Rory is already in- he like’s Rories), See comments, the list is too long to complete also SPOLIERS.
Height: 5’11.5
Hotness factor: Hello Sexy
Fandom: The Whoverse
Comments: He’s over 900 years old, think of all the time he’s had to perfect his technique. Also, they don’t call him lord for nothing- well hello SIIIR.

Report conclusion:

Mel proposes MERWHOLOCKRORY.....

Reports secondary conclusion: 

Fire Mel from Homojournal for being certifiably insane.

Goodnight folks, thanks for reading.

Mel