Introducing the Homojournal Jubilee Celebrations -a typical conversation

Our Jubilee themed banner, a source of great debate. 

Mel:  ‎*Applauds*

Miu: Kill me now.

Eli: What's wrong?

Miu: Was it not clear that I do not agree with the whole jubilee-theme?

Eli: ‎...Since when?

Eli: And Miu, we must celebrate the old.

Mel: Man up Miu. You live in England, You must love the queen....also tea.

Miu: Well I do not, sorry but not all English people must and I am not even English so…

Miu: You guys picked it and it's fine, I simply do not conform.

Mel: I guess you could write about what's going on in Italy.

Mel: What is happening over there anyway?

Eli: Dolce and gibanna are the queen and king, right?

Miu: ‎-.- First of all it's "gabbana" secondly... NEVER and thirdly... we have no monarchy.

Mel: Oh....who do you put on your stamps?

Todostrieb: Speak about the student strikes, or how everyone hates the new government!

Miu: whyyyyy? The theme is the jubilee and how does it have anything to do with homojournal.

Mel: I was going to speak about lack of gay royals...and the royal sex icons and scandals....also was going to mention bra fitting and the queens boobs.

Eli: What about that gay Indian prince? The one that was on telly looking for a man?

James: Nobody write about this man, he's claimed: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prince_George,_Duke_of_Kent

James: ‎"Both before and after his marriage, Prince George had a string of affairs with both men and women, from socialites to Hollywood celebrities."

"The Duke of Kent is said to have been addicted to drugs (notably morphine and cocaine) – a weakness which his brother the Prince of Wales was deputed to cure him of during the latter part of the 1920s – and reportedly was blackmailed by a male prostitute to whom he wrote intimate letters. Another of his reported sexual liaisons was with his distant cousin Louis Ferdinand, Prince of Prussia; art historian Anthony Blunt was reputedly another intimate."

Eli: Does this mean that next week's theme is "gay royals"?

James: It's just "Royalty", Queen's breast size, which royal you'd bang, etc...

Mel: Harry OBVS.

Todostrieb: Nah def. Kate.

Mel: Her too.

Eli: Ew, they're all gross. I'd rather bang the corgis. And I hate dogs.

Mel: I vote we print screen this thread for our Sunday post....and scribble out names on paint....

Miu: No one who wants to fuck the queen!? D:

Eli: Not when she lies back and thinks of England -.-

Mel: England is sexy. Plus, she used to be fit.

Mel: Bragging rights?

Eli: ‎...Not when someone shouts "Yorkshire" or "bull dog" or "tea!" or "fish and chips" when they cum. -.-

Mel: But isn't England all about stiff upper lip and restraint? Handcuffs and gags... illusions and role play, disguise and spies. Fucking outside in the rain...eloquent dirty talk and the corruption of those posh totties?

James: Quite frankly, the way Mel describes it, I want Mel as Queen.

Mel:  I've been campaigning for years. Finally some recognition.

Miu: Wait... by that James... do you mean you want to fuck Mel? o.O

Eli: I'm in the wrong England, I want to be in that one. *point to Mel and James, in a red telephone box*

Mel: Join us.

Miu: ‎*Hides behind the lamp post with a video camera* this is sooo going on the video section

Rory: Wait, I thought this whole theme was about what we would have done over 60 years on the throne..?

James: I think it'd work better if it was just "Anything "British Monarchy" related", you could do the 60 years thing, Mel can do the Queen's breast size (she mentioned it), I can do the amazing Prince George, Duke of Kent (sadly only by writing about him)...

Man-up! If they don't want gay... be as gay as you can be!

I am sure we all know that the only thing more irritating than someone annoying you accidentally is someone annoying you deliberately. At which point you just feel like either stuffing yourself with antidepressants (and cake) or taking out your alarmingly-crotch-height guillotine as revenge. But have you ever been on the "dark side"? How many times have you done something just because you were told not to? I know I have, plenty of times! Especially with James. Let me explain.

James sometimes (always) talks. Now sometimes (often) people ignore him. This makes James really frustrated because he has something really interesting to say, but people keep interrupting him (!). Finally he shouts: "Stop cutting me off! I'm trying to say something" (you should hear him, it is very funny). Anyways… James has finally got the attention he wanted and having gotten everyone to SHUT UP, he starts again: "As I was trying to say-" and once again he is promptly interrupted; but this time deliberately, maliciously  and hence, most irritatingly. It is quite entertaining to watch (ok, yes, I do it all the time).  And we keep going until his face looks like this

*sobs* Why won't they stop? I want mummy!

Ok, ok so maybe he looks  more like this…

If you don't stop now I'm going to murder you!

Oh lol… Wait what was the point of this? Ah yes, why not do the same with Gay-bashers? After all, you know what they say

Then again, having seen that second face (or keeping in mind that guillotine) you might want to reconsider. Although there is the lucky possibility of them running away crying because you are unaffected by their pathetic insults, you may also end up just making them angry and beating the crap out of you :D So before you decide to take on this approach, my advise is to consider who you are dealing with. If it is a short-tempered tall muscly guy who could crush you with one finger than you might want to lay low.

Nevertheless, you may also decide to toughen up, work out and build yourself an unbreakable character to go up to that bully and make him wished he never crossed your path muahahah. Hey don't judge me you'll understand if you look at this!

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Ff_6VsRuas

Oh come on! Did you not think that was amazing!? :D

Sure, if you are not the violent type you can always take on a more… loving approach?

Oh boy, can you really say that with a straight (non-sarcastic) face?

I just came across this article on the guardian app thingy on Facebook and… I have no words. I find it really appalling. "London buses have been booked to carry a Christian advertising campaign expected to start next week, which asserts the power of therapy to change the sexual orientation of gay people."

The anti-gay advertising campaign blocked by TfL to be shown on London buses

I mean, are you fucking serious!? I think this is one of those things that arise from ignorance as my fellow bloggers have already said and its people that just refuse to open their minds and think otherwise. It is something that makes me really sad… I mean, take for example the fact that they expressly support a practice that has been deemed, by every respectable psychiatric in the world, abusive and ineffective. Is that something that free speech covers? Advertising in favour of abuse? Maybe so, but is it something we as consumers should tolerate? The fact that a company would allow that type of advertising...

Although gay-bashers may be scary, one ought to remember that, as with all bigotry, the thing that gay bashers are - more than ignorant, more than stupid - is frightened. I mean "homoPHOBIA", it's right there in the bloody name! They are frightened because they are ignorant, and because they are frightened they are dangerous, nasty and angry.

The "solution" to this problem, for society, could be to alleviate their fear through education and (not to be too grim about it) indoctrination (the good kind). However, for the individual facing this problem, his or her solution is obvious - you frighten them, so get frightening.

We are always here for any advice (though I do not guarantee it would be good), but that's all for today. Don't forget I'll be back next week!

Love,

Miu xx

P.S. Don't forget to e-mail us at homojournal@gmail.com for any questions, comments, request or if you are bored and have nothing better to do. We are available 24/7 (that is 24 minutes every 7 hours) so try your luck!

OMG! Is that a Stereotype I see??

Well hello there special followers (I'm hoping there is at least 1 person following us :P)

We have now reached the much awaited weekend and on this fabulous Saturday morning I am here to discuss the stereotypical subject of stereotypes! I said fabulous cause I could see this tiny ray of sunlight peering through my bedroom shades; little did I know that - England being what it is -  when I opened the shades the sun had been covered by a thick sheet of clouds and it is now raining. Oh English weather… it always lives up to stereotypes don't you think?

Do not fear! I will not fall into the (yet other) stereotype of English people always talking about the weather; let me enlighten you. My name is Miu, no it is not a typical name and no I am not sure it is even real but that is not the point. I am the straight (at least 99% so) token/mascot of this insane group of non-hetero entities. I chose to write on Saturdays because, let it be said, it is the BEST day. I am 18 and NOT English, so what am I? Well that is a very good question that even the most esteemed philosophers or scientists have not been able to answer, so let it just be said that I am… [missing to protect identity]  or more simply: I just AM. To quote my dear friend (and by "friend" I mean "that idiot!") Descartes "Ego sum. Ego existo. (I am. I exist.)" Though I'm not even sure about that!

Now back to the point. Stereotypes. Most people hate them. Why? Because they are a way of passing judgement on a person merely based on ethnicity, gender, culture, religion, colour, height… and many many others. And of course, we insecure little humans just hate to be judged! I mean seriously, everyone around us is judging us in someway or another; even you are judging me in this exact moment while reading this blog. You are deciding whether I am just a crazed teenager or in need of serious medical attention. On the other hand you may also be considering how awesome I am, in which case carry on. The fact is, we do not hate the "nice" stereotypes. I don't see any African man going around saying: "Hey! How dare you say I have a big penis!?" But I do hear Indian/Japanese guys crying out: "its not true! Its not true!"
I once heard someone say (or probably just read it on FB)

"I live three lives:
○ The one I live everyday
○ The one people say I live
○ And the one my parents think I live"

Now I found that quite funny, as I too seem to live three lives - though probably even more. What about you? If it does apply to you then sorry honey, but you are a stereotypical teenager (or human being)! Now why did I used "stereotypical" rather than just "typical"? No matter the definition (thank you James!) they essentially have the same meaning. What makes us hate it so much is the negative connotations that come with it. We don't want to be put in a closed box. It is when people only see the stereotype and refuse to see the real person that it all becomes really annoying. But stereotypes aren't bad in themselves.

I tend to consider myself as...unique. I am not you r typical gal. Yet even I have fallen into a stereotype. I'm sitting at my desk writing on a blog while spinning around in my chair and lovingly wearing my boyfriend's oversized hoodie to comfort me while he is away! Nevertheless, stereotypes exist for a reason. Although most are not accurate, people really tend to behave similarly. It's a fact that most English people have their 5 o'clock tea. Call it stereotype, tradition or culture, in the end there's not much difference.

Either way I still find it amazing when you meet that ONE person who fits a stereotype perfectly! I think they are a rare endangered species that should be protected… or locked up - I mean looked after - in a museum for people to watch!

I think you've had enough of me by now so I will leave you to hopefully start a debate on whether what I said is utter bullshite (not a typo, read it as appropriate) or incredibly clever or perhaps insane. The latter tends to include the other two into one.

Do not despair, I'll be back next week!

Love,

Miu

P.S. Don't forget to e-mail us at homojournal@gmail.com for any questions, comments, request or if you are bored and have nothing better to do. We are available 24/7 (that is 24 minutes every 7 hours) so try your luck!

P.P.S. [ok that's a total lie that was true erm... a few days ago... now well... just drunk typing on the computer while my other fellow bloggers are getting off with each other LOL what a stereotype right?]