Oh, look, it's me again. Did you miss me? Probably not, but that's of little consequence to me, as I desperately sift through the Mauna Kea sized pile of clothing on my floor. You see, while I was off enjoying myself in pubs, bars and ditches, I quite completely forgot that Prom is:
a) on the 28th of June, and
b) quite a big deal.
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| Even if you are only there for the complementary red wine. |
Even the fact that this week's theme is "Prom from an LGBTQS Perspective", and has been for 2 weeks didn't alert me to the fact that Prom might be taking place sometime around now. It just didn't cross my mind at all. Back in Secondary School I spent 2 months panicking about it, trying to somehow find the perfect outfit to say both "I am fashionable, dapper and charming" and "I am very much, 102%, absolutely heterosexual" at the same time. In college, I could turn up to Prom dressed as Carmen Miranda and not too many people would give me a second glance.
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| Even the ones that did would only be doing so because my hat was more appetising than the food. |
In Secondary School, I had no idea who I was. I knew I'd considered guys handsome, even attractive, but it didn't click in my head that that was ok. As such, I spent almost all of Prom walking around in a daze, trying my level best not to look at the sporty guys in their fetching jackets, lest the world catch fire, the sky turn black and demons run amok. It wasn't amazingly pleasant.
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| "He shouldn't have worn tight trousers. And that bow-tie - oh god, that bow-tie..." |
Now, I can grope my friends as much as I like. I even have an in-joke with one of them about it (to Todostrieb's perpetual disdain). I'm not saying that this short post has exhausted every possible issue the LGBTQS community has with Prom; that's why there are 6 of us, to cover everything. I know there's issues with whether or not you can bring your boyfriend/girlfriend/hermaphrodite/transexual friend to Prom, and whether it's acceptable to dress as Lily Savage if you're 6ft 8" and have a goatee, but I can only comment on what I've experienced, and at the moment, the worst thing about Prom is that I have fuck-all fancy enough to wear apart from my fetish gear.
And I'm only 5ft 4", have no goatee, and my boyfriend doesn't even go to the school, so those issues, much like whether or not the Constant Readers wanted a double dose of James, are of little consequence to me.
Yours panickingly,
James
Seriously, I think Todostrieb's good will will only withstand so many incidences of me groping her boyfriend's crotch; I may be murdered soon.
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